7 Signs That Your Relationship Is Over (Or Should Be)

 
*"I Miss Your Smile… But I Miss Mine More"
Sometimes the hardest heartbreak is when you have to do the breaking up. You have to finally admit that this isn't working. Those fantasies are never going to be fulfilled.
You didn't fail. It just didn't work and it's time to end it. When is a breakup something you must do? When do you decide that you love him, but you love yourself more. Any woman who has ever had a breakup will tell you that "she knew" long before she ended it, that it was over.
We finally get to a place where you know that you have to do it, one of the markers is "I Miss Your Smile, But I miss mine more…" How do you honor your own intuition and not push it to the place where you are being damaged? We know when we are making excuses and settling for less than we deserve. You can choose to honor yourself and your intuition.
Signs that it's over:
1 -You stop wanting to be your best self.
2 -You stop putting energy into your appearance (ie: shaving, makeup), not because you feel comfortable, but because you don't care
3 -You are making excuses for him
4 -You feel like you are settling for less than you deserve
5 -You don't want to touch him
6 -You make excuses as to why you can't have sex, or even kiss right now
7 -Everything and everyone else is more important than spending time with him
Learn How to End It, Get Over It, and Move On Faster NOW
I know… Because I have been there.
I could actually imagine hundreds of hooks in my heart, each with a line at the end pulling in different directions. And at the end of every line was him. He was like a fisherman or a puppeteer, controlling me with even just the slightest word over text, tone in his voice on the phone, or simply his presence that seemed to linger in everything and almost everyone. I wanted to move on. I craved to be in a healthy loving relationship. But more than that, I wanted to move into a healthy and loving relationship with him. He was my ex. I ended it because it was toxic. But as badly was I knew I needed to unhook him from my heart, I wasn't ready to feel the ache of his emptiness without him. Even if what I had of him was lethal.
Toxic relationships can be completely debilitating. More than a shitty relationship, they can derail your career, force a wedge between your friendships, and completely destroy your self worth (what you deserve), sense of self (who you are), and self sufficiency (your ability to take care of yourself). You may have convinced yourself (possibly with his brainwashing help) that it's really "not that bad." But let me ask you: why do you often feel so awful, alone, insecure, scared, worthless, stupid, or small? Healthy relationships don't make you feel that way.
You know it isn't serving you. In fact, it's hurting you. Your wings feel clipped. Your ego is non-existent. You are almost a different person when you're with him, as if you have two personalities- the strong, fun one who your friends and family see; and the half person who your guy cuts you down to be. Or have you lost yourself completely?
SO you end it…
And then you feel alone and you miss the comfort of him. It's so easy to forget about the bad "moments" isn't it? You romanticize the relationship, allowing your mind to wander into the moments- which are truly moments- when you were great. But lets be honest, bad or good you miss him. So you text a photo of something that reminds you of him. Or you write down the lyrics to a song about heartbreak and email it to him. You stalk him on social media and the feelings come washing over you like a tidal wave. You can't stop obsessing.
Sure he told you that you were worthless, but he also told you that he never loved anyone like he loved you, and you believe him. You believe both of what he said in a sick and twisted way. You find comfort in "f**k you, I hate you" texts. You remember at the beginning when he didn't treat you this way and you know that if you are well behaved and you don't piss him off, he'll go back to being that guy… so you go back to him. And soon you fall into a new cycle- the breakup, get back together cycle. You stay until you can't stand it anymore, so you leave. But then you unbearably miss him, so you go back.
Let me tell you right now- things won't change. You are addicted. Just like a drug, addictions are often with unhealthy things that give you massive highs and destructive lows. It's the rollercoaster that fuels you. You mistake that intense passion for intense love. But you're wrong. You are spiraling in a cycle that you won't be able to pull him out of. You have to be the one to make the decision to step out of it and move on. It's a decision you have to make. And it's not an easy one. But if you want to find true and real love, you have no other choice. Once you make the decision, you have to take the steps to follow through. That means removing yourself from the triggers that tempt you to go back.
Once you made the decision, reset, rebuild, and find love in yourself first, then you WILL find someone better and more amazing for you. "The harder you slam a ball into the ground, the higher it bounces back up... A divorce, a breakup, losing a job, or just feeling seriously down can ground you, rough you up a bit, leave calluses on your feet and grit under your finger nails. But more than that, it leaves you wiser and stronger next time... Life is about experiencing opposites isn't it?"

xx Laurel

Laurel HouseLaurel House is an international Dating Coachand Flirting Expert, MTV's MADE "It Girl" Mentor, 4x published Lifestyle Author, and a go-to Expert on E! News. She recently completed her 5th book "Screwing The Rules: The No-Games Guide to Love," which will be released in December 2014 with Running Press.

With over 12 million views on YouTube, Laurel has created a platform to deliver dating and healthy lifestyle tips to the masses. Her dating tips appear on CupidsPulse.com, YourTango.com, SheKnows, DigitalRomance.com, FabFitFun.com, and a lot more. Because of her edgy, honest, and wide-ranging advice, she is often referred to as the modern-day Ann Landers (and sometimes the writer version of Taylor Swift). 

Source:yahoo.com